I had dinner with a friend. We both are single mothers and have little critters running about our legs (cats & dogs). Some of the topics we touched upon were our animals and our children and our 'bad' habits.

I came to realize, with my friend's help, that my potato chip issue came from my childhood - I knew it had to be my parent's fault one way or another. Just kidding. But I am now getting that some of my current vises probably have derived from a control issue.

I am an only child and growing up in an extremely controled environment is something that I am still dealing with to this day. I keep telling myself, 'baby steps.'

Potato chips was one of these controled vises. I had to eat everything my mother or father fixed me and if I didn't finish it in one sitting, I had to finish it in another. For example, breakfast was usually Raisin Bran (I still hate raisins) and if I didn't finish my soggy Raisin Bran for breakfast, it was served again to me for lunch. If I didn't finish the huge serving of steak and veggies for dinner, it was sometimes served to me again the next day (lunch or dinner).

No wonder why I am very leary of left-overs. I want no part of them to this day. Very interesting.

I remember my mom eating a lot of junk food like potato chips and candies when my dad was not home (he was a truck driver and wasn't home all of the time). I also remember asking if I could have some and I remember her response being 'NO' a lot of the time.

This may be the reason why I choose to eat junk food like potato chips...maybe because I can eat them now whenever I want to...so there!

Total freedom.

Time to move on from this issue...baby steps.

things were going ok until I saw that bag of doritos! Dang it.
I remember back when I had my first place (away from my parents-very first time on my own)...I filled the kitchen cabinets with...no, not dishes...but lots and lots of bags of potato chips. I ate out a lot with my friends...and when I was home it was time to SNACK on CHIPS!

Now, in my 40's, things have changed a little. No longer do chips occupy all cabinet space in my kitchen. Instead there is a shelf in one cabinet reserved for chips!

Ok, enough chips - I am going to try to go 1 week without purchasing and eating chips. Wish me luck!

Hi, Gretchen here again.
So, yesterday was the first day of my life. My goal is to get my weight back in check. Yesterday I did pretty good.
Breakfast consisted of: eggs and turkey for breakfast and OJ
Snack: a banana and some Greek style Fig yogurt - the Greek yogurt is a lot thicker than your regular Yoplait yogurt and water.
Lunch: I had leftover Banqkok Curry Chicken with white rice. Very yummy and spicy. I also drank water.
Snack: rice crispy treat - there were three pieces in one package - I only had one piece and water.
Dinner: I ate out. I had pasta jambalaya (very yummy and spicy). With that came a cup of corn chowder soup. I ate all of the soup and only 1/4 of the jambalaya. I also had Iced Tea to drink.
I manage to drink lots of water throughout the day - that's really hard for some. I probably drink, easily, 10-12 16-20oz glasses a day.
For exercise: we went shopping, so I parked really far away in the parking lot and we went down practically every aisle (even if I knew I didn't want anything from that aisle). So, I walked at a normal/steady pace for about 45-60 minutes.

Today, I got a Chanel Latte from a locally owned coffee joint here. I just love going there...I used to go daily and sometimes 2X a day. Now I've cut that back to maybe 2-3 X's a week (including weekends). And I usually get the same drink - yeah, I'm living on the edge. hee-hee-hee.
I made eggs and had turkey again for breakfast. It was so easy to make. Tomorrow I'll have something different (cereal or pancakes).

It's almost snack time: thinking I'll have another banana and yogurt - I don't want to eat that everyday - I'll get burned out from it.

We watched that show, 'biggest loser' on tv last night. I wish I had a personal trainer, that I could afford and that would be available to me 24/7. Oh well.

Right now I am sitting on my butt - not working anything out but my fingers and my brain! I should get moving. It's really dreary looking outside. I could go for a 30 minute walk with my dog...yeah, that would be nice. Ok, I'm outta here.

Today is the first day of my life. You know, I have said this phrase before...have you? I wonder how many times we can say that during our lifetime.

Let me introduce myself, my name is Gretchen. I'm from the south east corner of Montana. Winters here (I'm in Northern Nevada) are nothing compared to back home.

Today I weighed myself and I was shocked to see the #'s that came up. Those #'s are the same ones I saw at the doctor's office when I had my last child. I never ever thought I would weight that much again. Boy was I wrong.

Many questions I asked myself this morning were, 'How did my weight get out of my control?' 'What happened?' 'What did I do wrong?' 'Where did I go wrong?' 'How am I going to lose all of this extra weight?' 'How do I look?' 'What diet should I try now?' 'Why did the last diet(s) fail?' 'Why did I fail each diet?'

A lot of questions and not a lot of answers. One answer came to mind right away...lazy. Not that I am lazy and don't do anything at all. Don't get me wrong. I am a very active lady. I am constantly on the go with work, family, school, activities. I don't have breakfast and I don't always eat lunch. I am totally starving my 3pm. Sometimes I eat somewhere between 3-4pm, and sometimes I try to wait it out until dinner time. In most cases, the meal between 3-4pm and/or dinner will be eaten out (away from the house), because of our busy schedule. There may be an errand to run or something scheduled like Piano/guitar/soccer/etc. lessons afterwards or in between.

You know, I used to love to cook. I would cook so much I would always made enough for all of our friends and family to enjoy and/or a lot of leftovers.

Ever since my late husband passed away, my love for cooking faded and me and the kids started to eat out more. I always thought it was because I was avoiding going home. Home wasn't the place it once used to be.

So we moved. We seem to be home more and we seem to eat at home more too...but I'm guessing it's still not enough.

I've learned to cook less amounts of food (we don't enjoy leftovers). My kids love top ramen and chef boyardee. That's not what I cook - that's what I allow them to cook sometimes at home when I'm not in the mood to cook.

I usually cook roasts, stir frys, taco/burritos, and lots of veggies. I even bbq, which I like - well, unless I burn something (which I have done my fair share of). I am a huge fan of vegetables - I think that I eat a lot of them. I'll eat them raw, cooked, bbq, whatever. I just love my veggies, well, except for eggplant...I'm not a huge fan of eggplant. Don't get me wrong, it's an absolutely beautiful vegetable - the deep dark purple color is amazing.

Well, today is a new beginning for me. I'll probably take a lot of baby steps towards my new life and hopefully not too many big steps backwards.

I started with breakfast, 2 eggs and a palm-sized slice of turkey with a glass of orange juice.

When I'm done here, I will take my dog (she's getting up there in age) for a walk. Tomorrow, if I can schedule it, we may go to the dog park - which is just located a few miles from us.
What am I saying - if I can schedule it - I will mark it, in pen, on my calendar. There, it is now scheduled.

See, baby steps.